The last few months have been real busy in life. Have missed a lot of things and gained a lot of things(weight). But its time now to come out of the hibernation. Shed some weight and get back in touch. Have joined an awsm poject and there is an apple time and opportunity to expolit. But there is one thing in the bakend that I always have to process 'How long will I be able to hold this spark?'. That's the fear I always have in my mind. I always have been of this nature. I tend to like some things initially like crazy but loose interest very soon. My relations I had are no exceptions to this. I am thinking like a crazy person these days and somehow I have strated to liking this. I have done somethings in these past few days which I never wanted to do. Life changes and with them a lot of ur thoughts and beliefs change. I do not why I cannot controll my life I hate the idea that my life is controlled by someone else. I want to get lost in thoughts and studies I want to pronounce this real life and get into a life where I do not need to have emotions or beliefs. There be no good no bad where there be just true and false.